21.6.12

Vodafone-a-rue!

From almost Rs 8k in February to Rs 1.3k this month - the reduction in my phone bill is due to a simple activation of Vodafone’s uniform roaming tariff facility across Maharashtra. Even last month, I experienced the stark difference in the bill. It was only about 500 bucks more than this billing cycle.

Sure, it’s a great facility, but I have problems. And I’m not sure if addressing it to the parent company helps, or is it more to do with the process trickle down in the HR bloodline or the training hands hired. Or is it a pure communication problem?

Unlike most other cities in the country, a Bombay number is treated as an out-of-territory number vis avis Maharashtra. When I first moved to Pune, my bills sky rocketed. I wasn’t sure if it was my internet data usage, or texting or calls. And I hounded several of their contact centers as well as the customer care helpline repeatedly. Of course nothing came of it since each one of them had a different answer, including the website.

One would expect that a company of Vodafone’s size would make sure every face of the company speaks the same language. That, every communication invites interest. Now I have had at least three problems I can list at the tip of my fingers right away:

Outdated form on the Vodafone website, so you end up filling out a second one all over again at the contact centre. If one is in a hurry, or budgets time for several chores in the first week of her or his  arrival in a new city, is this how thou shalt waste her or his time? What a service oriented approach, iSay!

Very poor language at every customer care interaction – whether at their contact centres or on the phone helpline. Logically, if one cannot speak one language, then one switches to another that one is more comfortable with. I understand that most people in this country are short for education, leave alone any level of proficiency in their own mother tongue, English - I won't even get there. What the authorities seem to fail to understand is that the key to solving user problems is clear communications. In whichever language that both parties may comprehend. Why then, are there at least two choices on the electronic auto response system, if your live customer executives are going to neither make sense of what they tell you, nor of what you tell them. Classic case of looking London, Talking Tokyo!

Inadequate information on services, and therefore added inconvenience to the customer. So while on the helpline I am being told that a particular set of documents is valid, either more is actually required at the contact centre level, or worse still, the specifics are not furbished to the last detail.

Dear Vodafone,
I will not be able to dream up your exact documentation requirements.
Yours truly,
The Average Customer-on-the-move

I wish their customer executives would've told me much sooner that it was possible to simply activate this facility! I would not have wasted so much time and energy racking my brains and bothering my dad and friends here to provide me with some evidence of my innocence and banality of citizenship; that I deserved a cellphone connection just as much as the owner of Vodafone. Photocopies of phone bills, bank statements, rent agreements and what not!

Why do documentation requirements keep changing from time to time? Considering the excellent ability of our defense forces to protect us – our intelligence and technological advancement, I don’t reckon adding to the paperwork is going to ensure security to the country in any way. Drugs continue to be peddled; ammunition continues being transported and our buildings and monuments still burn.

It was a fluke call to customer care when a senior executive wanted to know why i wanted to terminate my Bombay number. When I told him I'd found a temporary prepaid connection to solve my expensive problem, he finally came out with the solution! Is that also an indication of our tendencies as a country to not supply those we serve with proper answers?

Or is it the norm at Vodafone to practice the policy of zero-information-unless-dug?

18.6.12

Not your typical day


This is not even a typical day at work. Not that all days at work follow any particular pattern. There is no routine, at least here for me. Especially now that my copy partner has left and I have no one to make a rut with, I do as I feel, I feel the moment and act upon it.

So this morning. It was different in several ways. I am still in the middle of anticipating a boil over from the boss. Which means I’d better watch my moves and make sure I churn out better stuff than usual. Chase excellence and make more effort to understand the nerve of the client and write accordingly. Yes I fucked up royally. But what’s more important and worse is that I had little or no gumption to admit my fault. Was it completely my fault even? I don’t know. Because some of it wasn’t.

Gosh I’m really straying. Back to now. Neither the internet nor the intranet network is accessible. What does that mean? It means neither work, nor the usual play can happen for at least a while. I can’t retrieve work files to continue stuff I may have started yesterday or work I must refer from the past. I can’t listen to the songs I have stashed away in my folder either. It’s all barred.

For a change, even if just to kill time, I say yes to the chaiwala, who conveniently forgets to give me change for my tenner. Bastard has a notorious reputation. I have sworn I’m gonna get him barred from coming here. I am.

For a while now, I’ve been feeling less and less sympathetic to these kids who resort to such menial jobs to eke out a living. They’re learning how to steal, not so much hard work as oversmartness there really.

The other day i posted something to the effect on my FB page and all hell let loose. Suddenly i realise opening one's mouth to voice an opinion is next to blasphemy. As if the right wingers didn't already have problem enough, even the non-politicals and idealists have their issues. And so the keep-mum policy works brilliantly. Of course, then no one knows what you think, and those who care just try harder to read you. Eyes, twitches, hunches and finger twiddles.