My
jazz teacher wrote the most wonderful words for me in a mail two days ago. Not
like ‘you move like a gazelle, my love’, more the sort that could only come
from him. For my poems, for my words, for me.
Allan
is on the mailing list of my poetry blog along with only 9 other people since quite a while. From time to
time, when my verse strikes a chord with him particularly, he responds on email.
I don’t know if the personal note is a conscious effort to not make too much
of a footprint on the public web, or just his way of showing he’s not flippant.
Either
way, his mails have always been thoughtful. Barely a few lines. Usually one or
two, Allan would never end at just one empty word though. 'Nice's and 'good read's are not his thing.
But this
time, his mail was not only different from usual, it became something of a
short conversation. He asked if I wrote what I felt or just random thoughts. In
my response, I told him that usually it's just collated thoughts - ideas of which one may think,
thoughts others voice or just words I may have read somewhere.
He replied
with appreciation for my 'capture of emotions'. He said they are 'the kind of
thought that one thinks, staring at the ceiling or when silent tears soak the
pillow' and signed off with this line "Lie, that you want to lay beside
me".
When someone
writes to you and chooses also to add just one more simple thought, can you
help but sit back and recall your favourite memory of such a being?
Allan
had taught me my first jazz number. When I was barely quitting teens and in the
middle of my first college play (managing music, and still in school myself), Allan
and I met a second time and spent much time bonding over my lack of any awareness of Western Classical music and his expertise in it. Not only did
he teach me the basics, but also tested my voice right then.
There are
few people in the midst of whom I feel rather small. My music teacher is one. Singing to Allan Rodrigues was only the second. And then it happened. He taught me
Summertime. I’ve probably heard more versions of the song since than I can
remember – Sarah Brightman, Louis Armstrong, a Latino version, and more.
In my
following mail, I told him of how this thought keeps visiting me from time to
time – I don't see him for such long interims, it's not funny. But I feel
honoured that despite his utterly reclusive disposition, he chooses to stay
connected – and I don’t mind the seeking of an appointment the previous night
on text or early morning on mail. His presence at my sister's wedding, all the music sessions with him at King's Circle...
I also
told him how much glee I still experience when I sing my version of Summertime
with a Malkauns bandish to those who will care to listen. How much surprised they look, and
how thankful I am to him.
Somehow,
the line he had signed off with fit into my poem harmoniously. I felt compelled to weave
it in and asked if I could flick it. The beautiful soul that he is to me,
here's what he said...
"Your
writing moves me and makes me want to respond. Strangely, whenever I am at my
busiest, your writing appears in my inbox. Am at a day long workshop and here's
the lovely poem...
Sing
away. Summertime was my gift to you. Your rendition of it is your gift to me
and others who hear it.
And to
think that you want to use my line... feels nice inside. Didn't think I had an
atom of writing in me.
Remember
the time I used your line that said 'And some midnights,/ Many
miles away,/ A text stirs you mid-slumber.'
I
often hear your voice in my mind and think of songs you'd sing. I'd love to
hear you again..."
Here's Lie on Mush Room, my poetry blog, with Allan's line incorporated.
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